Tuesday, August 22, 2006
its been some time since i last blogged.

thank you. thank you to you. for seeing past the flaw that i made. it was unfair on my part i know. you've been awesome and i wished you werent so nice cause it adds on to my guilt. but you're nice. and i cant deny that. and i wished i didnt do what i did. thank you ((: you make me feel all better with the concern that you show. platonic or not.

im sorry. and thank you ((:

im hooked on to straightjacket feeling. its become a necessity. i need a daily dose of it. or maybe two. to get me all emo and sappy and smile at stupid things. this is the best time to catch me being very un-riah like. but wait.. whats riah like? HEH. i see it as a song for shivaaa. but candyheart made me see that its more suited for me. whatever it is. I LOVE IT. i do i do i do ((:

today im fine without you
run away this time without you..

i had detention last friday and it was definitely one of the worst moments of my life. especially since i had to do it with syarif. who cant even sweep the floor properly lah for fuck's sake. i had to do it TWICE before the ic was satisfied. and all the time he was slanging around. trying to impress me. which he definitely didnt.

and thats when i come to realise that my mixed parentage isnt such a big deal anymore. when i was in bm. everyone went - whoaaa. but it was my turn to go whoaaa when i realised that there are people here in mi who have a much more interesting parentage than mine ((: its not original to me be anymore. you have to look like nadya or faizal and have people gawp at you. or ashikin lee. or nadia from science.

speaking of identities. I DONT HAVE ONE ANYMORE. thats right. i have successfully lost every single shred of identity that i have on me. hahahaha. no ic no ezlink. nothing. i should start carrying my passport and birth cert around. heh. KAYS NOT FUNNY. the point is. i hate not having an ezlink arnd. its restricting my freedom to travel. and i hate that. i like travelling. and exploring places.

im good at not getting lost ((:

me and shivaaa's been pretty tight recently. we'd go out after school. pig out. find reasons not to study. and then we study. and then i'd send her home. and ALWAYS when we reach the bus stop 188 would just zoom past. fuckerasshole. hahaha. and we're affectionate people ((: i like her show of affections. heh. BLUSH.

but.. as much as i hate to say it..

we're just friends )): we are. hahaha. so PEOPLE. please. dont scare my angel away.

oh wait! i got a starbucks lolly last thursday! YAYYYY ((: made my day that. BUT. i didnt have enough cow sense to take better care of it. and i just had to leave it lying arnd. and some assfuck got hold of it. took a lick. didnt like the taste and dumped it in the bin. YOU.. YOU.. whatever it is. you're MEAN ok! )):

garnet vs onyx for the volleyball interhouse finals. SO EXCITING OK. hahaha.

today was a bad day. i think its the result of months of pent up frustration. like isk is trying hard to present and some people just had to make noise. and i hate it. absolutely HATE IT when ms nora tries to crack a joke. i hate it when she interrupts people when they're speaking. i wished she had more sense NOT to do what she did. i didnt mean to snap at her. but i was pissed. VERY.

she would have talked to me i guess. but i chose to run away and pretend that i was going to donate my blood when i know i cant. LACK OF IRON YO. like wtf. i dont eat offals and how much red meat can i eat before i die of cholesterol anyway? red meat is a necessary evil. kaysbye. hahahaha. it is ok. for me that is. i have no other sources of iron. lols.

shivaaa gave me a muffin today ((: the really chocolatey one. hehehe.

yay! (: i love you.

you're awesome. remember that.

you're awesome too dear. hugs.

i spent time with candyheart yesterday. like FINALLY ((: and i enjoyed it. a lot.

ohh. joachim started msging me again a few days ago. hahaha.

i think thats all the significant events that came to mind. i get so pissed each time i have a great mind blog but forget EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM when i get home. damn.

oh btw..

HAPPY NINETEENTH JULIE! ((: [21 AUG 2006] HAPPY EIGHTEENTH KIMMY DEAR! ((: [20 AUG 2006] hope you guys had an awesome celebration. heh. you deserve it. you deserve the best cause you're just so awesome. hugs. all presents will be belated ahh. PROMOS COMING. hahahaha :D

HAPPY TWENTIETH AZURA! ((: [18 AUG 2006] i hope you had a wonderful celebration with isk. may all your hopes and dreams come true and i wish the both of you nothing but the best of wishes ((: eternal sunshine and marital bliss and all okayys? HEH.

riahh ranted at 11:03:00 PM