Friday, July 07, 2006
I WAS SEXUALLY HARASSED TODAY.

no you did not read wrong. i was. and i am very angry about it. angry for not having been fast enough to catch the scum.

i spent the whole day with liyi girlfriend in town. on the whole we had serious girlfriend moments together. macs breakfast. much laughter abt past things and all. and adopting silly tones and imitating some silly girl. and all the bapoks we saw in town today. the dude with the eroded/corroded face. the nonsense gay with his WAHLAOdamnNICEboobs. ate. shopped. i wanted an impulse purchase but for some reason stinkieee managed to dissuade me from buying that top from MANGO. neoprints were wasteful. HEHS.

laughed too much. and so we ended up walking to ps. headed to times because i had that insane impulse to read up on horoscopes. HAHAHAHAHAHA. for the love of God. rolls eyes. and i was upset because i couldnt find the 2006 readings. nonsense. 2007 hasnt even arrived and the book's out already. talk about paranoia.

THE STORY STARTS..

so i grabbed a few books and we settled down by the horoscope section. i left my bag with her and went to look again for my books. so i came back and my bag was there but she wasnt. SILLY GIRL. she left my bag there and went two aisles back. we wanted to sit but there were boxes everywhere. SILLY PEOPLE UNPACKING BOXES DURING SHOPPING TIME. so i moved to the aisle in front and told her i'd wait there for her while she went to look for terry pretchet's books.

the aisle was full of the CHICKEN SOUP FOR THE SOUL nonsense.

i started to read. then i heard someone talking on the phone. AIYA NATURALLY CURIOUS OK. so it went something along the lines of - hey where are you? fucker. i said i'd be at the bookstore right? im at the bookstore. FUCKER. are you coming or not? im not speaking ok. i wont speak. i'll just masturbate. fucker. i'll masturbate. dont bother to come. and bla bla bla.

wouldnt you be curious? some dude talking dirty to his girlfriend cause he was angry at her for not being on time or sth. i peered thru the gaps on the shelves trying to see who he was. AND WHETHER HE WAS CUTE. saw a pair of legs. but when the person walked past it turned out to be some DIRTY OLD MAN. yes. dirty old man.

i profess myself disappointed. turned back to my books.

so this dirty old man hung around my aisle a lot. i paid him no attention. he looked thru a couple of books. CHICKEN SOUP FOR THE SOUL PLEASE. just to remind you people. he browsed thru a shelf and because i thought my bag was in the way i moved it to my other side and continued reading. he kept on coming closer. then liyi came. and told me she cant find her books and she left again. the man moved away when she came but moved in again when she left.

OK I STILL DIDNT SUSPECT ANYTHING.

the man moved closer and closer. he kept touching some books on the shelf but because i didnt pay him any attention he could have been fingering the same book and i wouldnt know. SIXTH SENSE. or woman's intuition rubbish or whatever. but i felt alarm bells ring. i pulled my skirt longer and bent forward to cover as much of my front as possible. then he bent next to me. and there was movement. i looked up and HE WAS FUCKING MASTURBATING IN FRONT OF ME AND HE STILL HAD THE FUCKING GALL TO STARE AT ME.

and what did i do?

TURNED BACK TO MY BOOK. and then it hit me. what just happened. i grabbed the books and my bag and left to find liyi. he left too. knowing that sth was up. i didnt knw what i was doing. i was shaking. fear? disgust? disbelief? i rattled to liyi. gibberish. dont knw if she caught my words. and i chased the motherfucker. AND HE RAN. FUCK IT. HE RAN. AND HE FUCKING GOT AWAY.

IF I SEE HIM AGAIN I WILL.. I WILL..

be very angry i suspect. and scared. very scared.

its not seeing his bloody bird that frightened me. its the whole.. process. like. why me? why must it happen to me? why did i let it happen to me? why couldnt i have been faster? smarter? i was very upset after that. affected. all that bravado and shits. I AM SHAKING INSIDE. my hands are cold. still cold.

and i started to feel conscious about people staring at me. STOP STARING AT ME. everyone's staring at me. i can feel their eyes on me. when people turn to look at me at bus stands or on the escalator i can feel it. I CANNOT BELIEVE THIS HAPPENED TO ME.

no i am really very cautious of men who try to be funny. all those retards adding me in friendster. FUCK OFF PEOPLE. and for that ex-moron of a bf. get a life. move away and kill yourself or sth. no one will miss you. and today. SOME DUDE AT THE CHICKEN RICE STALL TRIED TO BE FUNNY. no one's laughing ok. stop flirting. STOP ALL YOUR NONSENSE.

MEN SHOULD ROT AND DIE IN HELL.

but i enjoyed myself with liyi. i spent money. too much. i need to purge myself. i dont knw. spend. i need to spend. be happy. spend. liyi. it wasnt your fault. i love you girlfriend. think of miaow miaow and the retarded OLD MAN cashier in 7-11.

lit one was ok. some awesome i think? but never too good to get complacent. studying online was a mess last night. HAHA. people were confusing me left right and centre. last minute cramming on the way to school. M4M IS TRASH. really. but it was ok. i couldnt stop laughing when daffi was late today. cause i remembered what faizal said that morning. about the two of them discussing late into the night and them wanting to wake up at 3 to discuss some more.

i am only human. i am affected.

why me?

riahh ranted at 8:44:00 PM