Saturday, October 01, 2005
you know. im really glad that some people do read my blog on a frequent basis. totally lights up my day. and im sorry there hasnt been any updates for nearly a week cause im busy pia-ing for exams. its sick i know. that and being emo. and wondering why everyone hates me. and basically just trying to cope with things that werent there before.

doesnt it really pains you sometimes? that a budding friendship can never bloom because the trust is broken? that you have to be wary of what you say and do arnd someone because you discover something horrid abt her? that you keep getting angry at a friend because she cant get her life back on track even after all the times you tried to help?

or maybe im just being condescending towards liyi. there's just this feeling of worldly gratification after ive accomplished mugging a certain subject. and i feel it only right to let the whole world know. oh wells. sheesh. i should just shut up and die.

a week full of reflections i must say. so many things happened. feelings come and feelings go. i cannot believe nigel would stoop so low as to bitch abt me behind my back. i mean no qualms abt saying his name since i dont really make it a point to conceal my disgust towards him. so the bitchy la please. just because i happen to have more leader potential than you. just because my abysmal mye results were better than yours and stuff. just because i got into sle and you didnt. you get all upset and vengeful and stuff. phsaw.

its been a few days nigel my friend. i have no time to sit and think and ponder and get emo wondering why the fuck i go around begging people for nominations when really you know and i know i'd probably have a higher percentage of getting in than you.

ive not typed fuck in ages. the impact was amazing. ohh. that was a totally saucy-bitchy remark. lol. havent done that in ages. thats all the glory you gona get nigel malcolm seow. i have no more time for you. oh please.

pink is such a nice person really. i have a strong suspicion that he knws everything that goes arnd in class just that he doesnt want to sow discords among us. and for that pink im actually much nicer to liling you know. PHSAW. that is like so.. BUY 4D PLEASE! hahaha.

feelings for meroy came. feelings for meroy went.

2 hrs plus totally wasted at sakae sushi on wednesday. met up with julianne. so much to bitch abt. i think they totally hate us. we're the worse patrons in the whole universe. and i had to cough up so much to cover their losses. LOL. kidding people. pretty much open-heart talks. hmms yup. nothing much to hide there.

i bought new earrings. dangly gold butterflies. meroy chose it. haha. i went to school and mr chan asked me if that was allowed. i got all soppy and whiny and LOL. he told me not to worry that he's not the type to confiscate my new expensive earrings. LOL. he rawkks. me and him - we have a connection. haha. he finally found out that there is a non-enraged side of me. he said im nicer that way. awww.

everyday's a beautiful day. really love the uncertainty of the weather sometimes. tho the heat is totally killing me. today i spent the better part of the afternoon studying econs at national library. its my daily routine now. sighhs. as i walked to the bus stop. it dawned on me how pretty the sun looked in the sky today. how everything was bathed in fierce golden sunlight. how there were no dark clouds to mar the beauty of the world. and im spending the day indoors.

does anyone really notice how sunlight pierces through the canopy out in the open field in the morning? light travels in a straight line and it is best illustrated every morning. i feast my eyes hungrily at the light penetrating and fanning out as soon as it reaches gaps in the trees. the light that doesnt hit an object remains unobtrusive and undisturbed. pure and golden.

i totally forgot to mention that i beat tao yan si for the recent gp essay. HAHA. that lisp-deluded boy. tskk. the same day. hamster sent me a chinese sms. HAHA. yay (: thanks for that. totally love you guys to bits.

gp exam yesterday. what a bitch of a day. late for school. nearly laughed my guts out when ivan lim was lecturing. TOTALLY LOVE HIM TO BITS LA.

'have you no dignity at all? are you all so shameless? if you think that the school is unworthy of your presence. there are withdrawal forms available. we give you 15 mins grace but you're still late. bunch of ingrates!'

lol. i told you he rawkks.

i think ms ng knows that i talk abt her all the time. HAHAHA. i mean guys look at her. girls look at her. i look at her. she's the object of obsession among the male species and the object of envy among deficit girls like.. me. LOL. i hope she doesnt hate me. i think she does. she said i have no more hope. AWWWW ):

anamalai ave coffee shop sucks la please. talk abt HYGIENE. knn. you all lucky i never bitch in the forum la. disgusting. expect me to eat there. no choice la. must finish my very expensive fried rice. CHEAT ME LA YOU ALL! cries. totally pissed.

took my revenge on gp. attacked it left right and centre. gave it my all. pummelled it into nothingness. i hope i did well. over confidence doesnt beget good results. OH SHIT. paper 2 was a killer la. expletives of every kind floated thru my mind asking me to focus on the task at hand and not fall asleep reading the passages. i mean.. hello? corporate executives and social contracts dont go well with riah the ultimate chio bu.

i hope my friends wont be demoralised over this paper. i hope rj people gets a try. HAHA. millennia also got some standard la please. cheer up. more papers to go. jia you!

i hope firdauz doesnt get into mi. i will withdraw.

had a wonderful bday celebration for zoey (: totally surprised her la. LOL. so much planning sia. and me hiding under the table. HAHAHA. yay! run here run there. in the end. all went well. im glad she really enjoyed herself (: kaiwei rawkks la. she so funny sia. wah hahaha. me and her talk rubbish only sia.

im glad i met up with all my unity darlings (: so much fun smsing you people after that. and thanks for confiding in me and letting me have the opportunity to get to know you better (: DENISE CHONG I LOVE.. YOUR TEETH (: yay! *does the birdy thingie* hahaha. i think he too handsome liao. faints. HAHA.

hmms. hello jervis my new unity friend. tho u'll never read this. hello to library book lender tho you'll never read this too.

i asked this complete stranger whether he could borrow a book for me under his name cause it was really important to me that hilmi gets a copy too. he called me a crazy bitch. laughingly of course. crazy bugger. yay. new friend. hmms.

its doing me good. and him too i guess. this moment of mutual seperation. i dont think i'll ever look him up again. except for unity band pracs which is inevitable. HAHA (: but the next time i'll talk to him would be new year's eve. i hope he'd cool down by then and everything's fine and happy. cause i dont wana lose a friend like him. congrats to you for passing ur theory test (: you rawkk.

alan is such a bitch la really. LOL. worse than me. and i thought i was the queen of bitch. some fun hanging out with almadil and the anamalais. much laughter tho. THAT BITCHY ALAN. lol. totally jack me right in my face. OH NEVER MIND (: all in good fun i know. totally felt emo la. and so was liyi. HEART-TO-HEART. yay! everything's out. i love her really.

cause i can like totally show off my verbose skills. but THATS NOT THE POINT (:

no matter what. no matter when. we'd still be friends. i dont talk to my regularz much. but we all know that deep down we'd still be friends forever. corny i know. but hey life's like that. lets just hope its just the exam stress la. and everyone's just grouchy and bitchy and stuff. everything will fall back into place sooner or later. hugs.

i dont knw why but julie irritates me more and more each time i hang out with her. i think it has sth to do with the stereotypically high expectations of a towner. sheesh.

ok yeah thats it. im done chunking my thoughts all over the place (: im off to sleep. STUDYING AGAIN TMR.

faints and dies.

riahh ranted at 11:41:00 PM