Friday, April 22, 2005
today was a horrible day. disappointment. that was what i felt for most of the day. i was very excited abt finally being able to go down to visit my band after many months.

first yew hao msged saying he may be late. den they implemented a new rule : the side gate was locked ON A FRIDAY AFTERNOON. the minute i got in mrs chang was kao bei-ing so much. and she asked me to get out. oh please. i stayed on anyway. helped out MY section. den terence confronted me abt the performance thing.

terence took a long time to settle down. he was pissed abt not having full attendance and he dont want to start without a full band. he was the exact replica of mr hong today. everything he said or did reminded me of mr hong. he was lame. arrogant and he put on airs. his way of teaching is ridiculous to some extent and his choice of songs are not very appropriate for this batch. BUT WHATEVER. i will not comment.

i have no idea why li yan and pearlyn are so bent on this party thing. its absolute rubbish. i spent an hour plus on sectionals with my new junior - wen jie. and i did good. i felt back that satisfaction when i squeezed sth out of someone. he was like crap when i first took him. he was new with the instrument. cant rmb the positions. cant get embrochure right. always puffing his cheeks. patience goes a long way. in that course of time. i taught him how to blow louder using his diaphragm. how to play high and low notes. i taught him to control his muscles. i thought him how to tongue. i taught him how to hold the note and how to hit the note on the first try.

i taught him how to play.

li yan and pearlyn were running arnd not doing their sectionals. they were busy preparing the 'party' that was supposed to happen after band. the discipline was horrible. no one listened when the leaders or mr terence was talking. the leaders are so soft spoken and dependent on the alumni. they were having a prize presentation for goodness sake. when li yan called upon mrs chang to give away the bday prize no one clapped - all too busy talking among themselves.

no leaders noticed this. its disrespectful. not to mention humiliating. what kind of a band is this? we talk abt unity? no. we are LIKE unity. if not worse. no discipline at all. playing the name reversal game that we thought up. u chose to play it u do the explaining. when li yan asked us to help out i told her off. asked her to do it herself. and thankfully the rest backed me up.

leaders. what are leaders for? to say thank you and goodbye mr terence? to organize useless parties? soft spoken leaders who dont require respect and discipline of the band? i also can be one. anyone can be one.

kah heng even used vulgarities in the band. and no one made a big deal out of it.

terence was just like mr hong today in every single aspect down to the tiniest detail. i cant call it home anymore. its not home. gone were the days when we used to have basic courtesy to at least listen when someone is up there talking. one person standing up and we shut up without much difficulties. we work hard. we play hard. we could balance the time and the responsibilities then. whats the difference now?

leaders. im disappointed in you.

i just stoned and yew hao constantly asked me if i was bored or sth. i was just upset. and i suddenly turned and left when we were walking out. i just needed to get away from it all. i just.. needed to get away.

headed to tanglin to accompany mum. sit to close to band maybe? i thought they were soft. and from where i was sitting i could hardly hear the winds. their ending not so ba ba. no energy maybe? talked a lot with liyana and hilda talk talk abt the mai-hilda-xtina problem. sighh. den i talked to her also. talked everywhere. SIGHHHHHHH.

food was nice. tts all. and mr wong. my name is RIAH. not MAIMUNAH'S SISTER.

i thought refat looked nice today. he looks slimmer at least. or tts what mum said. she says his hair looks fake. i thought it was nicer than usual. =X. no further comments ur honor. *rolls eyes.

and den mai talked to me abt her version of mai-hilda-xtina problem. and the hilda-jannah problem. and the hilda-liyana-whole world problem.

i need to learn to take things easy. but i cant. mr han was unreasonable. i dont think i deserved that.

riahh ranted at 11:41:00 PM